Thursday 11 June 2009

Thanks Mum

My Mum wants me to move to Portarlington. She's really keen on it. On the way up she kept on pointing out things she thought I would like. Why she did this I don't know, as I was 3/4 asleep and 1/4 grumpy due to intense lack of sleep.

It got worse.

She then started out pointing out all the different churches. "There's even a bunch of your loopy 'born-again' types here Samantha. You could go to that church". That's how I knew Mum was very serious. She thinks born-agains are a CULT. They do cult-like things like read the Bible, and go to church, and pray, and cult-like things like that.

It then got funny.

She started to go on about the virtues of the boys. "Lovely Celtic boys. They'll look good in a kilt and they'll go dancing with you." (Scottish dancing that is.)

I raised my eyebrows. It got better.

"They're lovely Celtic boys. Farmers and agrian boys. The type who'll give you a massive bunch of children, will beat you around a bit, and then go to church on Sunday." She paused, and then said, "That is what you need in a man."

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